The past few weeks I've been really down, mixed in with some utter happiness about fall starting, but nonetheless, I've felt off.
It kind of feels like when I graduated and everything was up in the air. There was a lot of change on the horizon and new beginnings... it kind of feels like that now expect that nothing is really changing.
I feel like things should be changing though.
I guess I have stumbled upon the true quarter-life crisis, two months early. My 25th birthday is on November 30th and it feels like things should be moving at a faster pace. I feel old, I feel like I'm behind. I'm single, in the same job I was when I graduated (which is FINE because I really love my job), and still living at home.
I never compare myself to other people but right now, I am. I see other people moving out and doing different things and I don't feel like I'm moving as fast as everyone else. I've always been a late bloomer, in so many ways, and I think that I'm just running late, as per usual.
I feel like I don't know where I want my life to go. Do I want to stay in social media forever? Do I want to move into full-time writing? Will I ever finish the book I'm writing? Do I want a total change and go into publishing? Will my blog ever make it?
There are so many career-related questions because my career is the only thing I have a real control over. My love life is another story... while I have some sort of control over that, I don't really because it's all about emotions and I'm a rather shy girl so I've never had much luck in that department.
My living situation...I'm perfectly fine at home. It's just me and my mom right now so it's like living with a roommate anyway. I don't feel financially responsible enough to live on my own just quite yet.
I feel like I'm losing control of everything and it's really scary to be at this weird crossroad that I was at just three years ago. Back then, I had an excuse, I had just graduated college.
What is my excuse now?
I'm hoping that I'll feel better soon and that maybe with some reading, writing, and planning I'll get over this hump... that is until November 30th when I'm officially in my mid-twenties.
xoxo
B
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