2022 was a year of change and growth in so many ways. I learned a lot about myself, let go of past issues and feel like I came into my own. I felt like I woke up from a dream and started realizing how I want to live my life.
2022 was the year I turned 30 and while in January, I felt very hesitant and scared for how I would react to this major change, when it was all said and done I was pretty ok with this milestone. I didn't freak out, I didn't go running for the hills and rather I was completely at peace with turning 30.
My life does not look like I thought it would in the year 2023 but I'm ok with that. 2022 was the year I threw away society's timeline and lived for me. I didn't worry about what I was missing out on, I didn't force myself to live by the standards everyone around me might expect. I turned 30 years old living at home with my mom, with no boyfriend or romantic prospects, and in severe debt.
However, I think 2023 is going to be the year that changes all of that. I have high hopes for this year, I think we're on the cusp of some good change and after the decade that I've had, I desperately need it.
2022 kicked off with me catching Covid, a close family member passing away and me going off of birth control which lead to the most intense mental health spiral I've had in a while.
The hormones and body regulation I was going through after 8 years on the pill knocked me down like a ton of bricks. I was convinced I was going insane and it was hard to deal with. Every month I would lose my mind a bit; I'd cry, scream, throw a tantrum and not feel like myself at all.
After about 6 months, I was back to normal and trying to get in touch with my body again and how to make myself feel good. That's still a journey I'm on.
2022 was the year we lost my grandpa. I'm not a stranger to death... it surrounds my family and hangs above us like a dark cloud. My great aunt passed away in November, my grandpa's sister, and my family just shrugged and laughed a bit at how we're pros at this by now. Death has knocked us down year after year, and now without my grandpa, we're all learning to live a new normal.
2022 was the year that I didn't date at all. I barely touched the dating apps, I couldn't deal with it. I didn't want to be someone's pen pal, I didn't want to put myself through the headache of trying to convince myself that I needed to date. I wanted to just focus on me, and I did. I felt lighter without the pressure and I think that helped me realize that I won't be alone forever, I'm not going to be the only person to never fall in love again and that my someone is out there. I took the notion of 'what's meant to be will be' very seriously.
2022 was the year I got my dream job. I've always thought I'd work at the Estée Lauder companies because when you work in beauty for as long as I have, you know that's the mothership. That's where you end up at some point in your career and to know that I worked hard, took my time, and got this job all on my own skill is incredibly rewarding. I went through a lot career wise this year, thinking I didn't want to be in social media and beauty anymore but I realized that I do, I love it so much and there is so much to accomplish in this space. It's very exciting.
2022 taught me that life changes every day and anything is possible, both good and bad.
For 2023, I have some lofty goals ahead of me; I want to pay off my debt, I want to move out, I want to finally finish writing a novel, I want to make content creator a bigger part of my income and daily life, I want to self-publish an e-book and I'd like to travel to Europe.
For 2023, I want to hold myself accountable, I want to be better mentally, physically and emotionally, I want to have fun and live my life, I want to not let my mental health hold me back. I want to take charge and live my life versus let life pass me by.
I've done this song and dance before, you can go and read about it in many prior posts but this year feels different... it feels like something good is brewing and I can't wait to see if I'm right.
xoxo
B
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