It's that time of year when I get a little antsy and want to redecorate, declutter and get a new wardrobe. I also feel the need to declutter my life, find new organization systems and make a change. I'm just tired of feeling the same way, going through the same motions and not being present for life.

I want to find the things that bring me joy, find a better balance and just be more clear with my intentions in all areas of my life. That being said, I might take a little break from the blog. My heart has not been in it for the past year and I do not want to let it go, so I've been holding on for dear life. I don't want to hold onto something that isn't serving me anymore and I think I just need a creative spark back.

We'll see how long this lasts but in the meantime, be sure to follow me on all the things:

• Substack
• Instagram
• Threads
• TikTok 

This week was actually pretty solid, and I'm very thankful for that. It started out in a blah way, only because it was the 9 year anniversary of my dad passing away. I've catalogued my relationship with grief many times over the course of 9 years and while it has gotten easier, not a day goes by that I don't think about my dad. 

It's a strange feeling, to know that you will never see someone again and that they are going to miss all the big moments in your life. I can't write about it too much otherwise I will start to cry and maybe never stop, but it's just sad.

Last weekend my family and I celebrated my baby cousin's 1st birthday, who actually was born on the anniversary of my dad's death. This child is my dad's great nephew, and wow, would he have loved being a great uncle. He loved kids and he would love to see his nephew, my cousin, as a dad. It makes me sad that they will never never know him, and vice versa. 

Grief is a fickle thing but it's all grounded in love.

Moving on... 

My team and I moved at work so I was in a new area of the office with people I usually email with and see over Teams but never interact with in person, so it was fun and interesting. It made work a little more enjoyable and interesting. 

This weekend is going to be another busy one; going dress shopping with my mom for my sister's wedding, hanging out with friends and overall just getting things done while also finding time to socialize. 

Enough yapping, let's get into the roundup.

 This week was better than the last few and for that I am grateful. I still feel slightly disconnected from reality but I think that is just the pollen count going from nonexistent to medium in the span of two days.

While I was super productive this week, my creativity feels like it's at an all time low and I don't really know how to solve that. It feels like the older I get, the more it slips away from me and that is very scary. Everything that used to be important to me takes a back seat now and it needs to be solved, I need to do better by myself.

In other news, last night I was at dinner with my family, today was spent running errands in my new car that I love so much, and tomorrow is another family get together. For the rest of the day, I just want to unwind, write, clean and do what I have to do. 

Let's get into the roundup.

 Happy Saturday! I'm tardy again with my blog post, and just tardy for everything in my life. It was another hellish week that nearly broke me but the sun is shining, it's freezing out and I have an Oura ring sleep score of 80. 

What I'm starting to realize is I need a better work-life balance; I need a better organization system, and I need to learn to handle stress better. I didn't think those were issues I had but it seems to be affecting me more and more, so I'll need to figure that out.

I also need to figure out how to make time for the things that bring me joy, or truly figure out what does bring me joy. I've slacked so much with the blog over the past year, as well as content creation as a whole -- what does that say about me? Creating has been the one constant in my life for over a decade, I don't want to give it up but maybe I need to figure out how it fits back into my life...or just stop being lazy because I think that's what it ultimately comes down too.

My screen time has gotten really bad so if I could just put the phone down, maybe I could pick up my computer and write. I'm continually hitting my 'rock bottom' in all areas of life but can never pull myself up high enough to get it together. What will be my breaking point? 

That concludes my existential crisis for the week, let's get into the roundup!

 Wow, what a week. I feel like I haven't been able to breathe for the past few until now. I know I keep saying it, but work has been so busy and we've finally crossed the finish line. It feels so good to decompress, to relax and just lean into the slowness. It also helps that I have a 3-day weekend (3.5 if you count the fact that I had a half day of work on Friday, which I kind of worked through). 

Yesterday, I went to my cousin's baby shower and it was such a nice day with family. Afterwards, my sister and I went to my mom's house and hung around for most of the day and then we had a sleepover. Now, I need to actually get my life together -- go grocery shopping, pay bills, organize and clean my home, and just do adult things.

Let's get into the roundup.

This week seemed better than the past few, didn't it? There were lots of protests, lots of slamming President Musk in court and I stayed off social media, so I kept my sanity. I weirdly cried a lot and was overly emotional about a lot of things but it felt net positive.

After a really busy, and incredible Thursday at work where we hosted a bunch of influencers, I'm looking forward to staying home all weekend. I want to relax, read, watching television and snuggle under a blanket. I want to be present and calm, but that's really all I ever want.

I also want to gear up for another really busy week at work because I have a video shoot with more influencers, which is going to be so fun but very stressful. Then, lots of social events are planned for the coming months so I want to try to be as present in my mind and body as possible. 

Let's get into the roundup!

I don't understand how it's still January, I don't understand how so much has happened in 31 days the past two weeks. This is a bad dream I want to wake up from.

Besides the world falling down around us, my head has been spinning in every direction. I have not felt connected to my body, I feel like I'm floating and just unable to keep up with everything going on. I was doing good, and then I slipped, letting my guard down and letting myself get sucked back into the digital void. 

It doesn't help that I started reading Fourth Wing over the weekend and am already almost halfway through Onyx Storm, so my sense of reality is all screwed up. I always tend to have a little bit of an outer body experience when I get sucked into a good book series, and this is no different.

I was busy all last weekend (with all positive things) and the same goes for this weekend. Work has been insane and we have a really intense two weeks coming up; I am just racing to the finish line and I feel like I can't breathe. I feel like I'm not living, I'm just going through the motions, checking items off a to-do list and crossing days off the calendar. I hate that feeling and I vowed that 2025 would be different...but that's really difficult when you're in fight or flight mode at all hours of the day because your world is evaporating before your eyes.

That's why I haven't blogged, why I haven't written any of my book draft, why a YouTube video sits half edited in my iMovie queue and why I can't even find it in me to press post on a TikTok video. I am frozen and I don't know how to unfreeze myself.

That was a lot, and I apologize but I just needed to get it all out.

I'm hoping that a really nice weekend with family and friends will do my body, mind and spirit better so we will see. Let's get into the roundup.

 It is January 80th. No one is sane. Half of the country is frozen, the other is still burning. We live in hell. Why is it that 4 day work weeks are always longer than 5 day weeks? I don't understand how we still have an entire week left of January...it doesn't make any sense. 

This was a very hard week, with a lot of news flying at us and truly, in the blink of an eye, our entire world changed. It's horrible but please take care of yourself, your loved ones and stay off social media. I might do an entire post either here or on Substack about social media and the state of the world. 

Speaking of social media, TikTok went away for only 14 hours this weekend and it nearly caused me to have a heart attack. I could not handle the uncertainty that came along with it, and all the implications that came along with it. The doomsday narratives, the doomscrolling, it was all too much for me which is why I'm happy to say that I have spent minimal time on TikTok since it was brought back.

And it feels good.

But more on that later, let's get into the roundup.

I cannot believe it is only January 17th. This year has been 500 weeks long and we are only in the 2nd full week. This week was very hard, for a variety of reasons and truthfully, I just want it to be January 21st. I want to get the inauguration over with and I want to know what the hell is happening with the TikTok ban. 

It's a horrible game of limbo that we're all in, and my anxiety manifests itself when it feels uncertainty in the air. I also need to get better about protecting my peace and not seeking out the things that cause me anxiety. 

I'm going to do my best to relax and find some sort of peace this weekend. Lord knows I need it. 

 I don't have many words to say. It's Thursday night, the LA fires are still raging and I feel completely and utterly hopeless. I feel helpless, exhausted and unsure of how we as a society are going to survive this. I don't know how much more humanity could take. 

If you're looking for resources to help the people in LA, Vogue has a great list of resources and honestly, most brands and organizations are posting lists on social media so you could find them easily. I've donated to the LAFD Foundation via Instagram fundraisers and honestly, they make it so easy to just click a few buttons and submit your pledge.

I don't really have much else to say; I'm a little burnt out so let's just get into the roundup.

Here we are, folks...the first round up of a new year. It always brings me such joy to write 'Week 1' as the title of this blog post. It's a fresh start, a new page; there's hope in the air and a pep in our step. I'm sure that will last only until next weekend but a girl can dream, right? 

This week was weird. I don't think I'll feel normal until Tuesday when I'm on my commute to work. Monday felt like a Friday, Wednesday felt like a Sunday and Friday honestly felt like a Wednesday to me. Christmas feels like it was 100 years ago, not less than 2 weeks. 

As much as I enjoyed this extended break, I'm ready to get back to reality. I want structure, routines and my regular Bravo TV schedule back. 

The new year has been weird so far; it doesn't feel brand new, it doesn't feel much different (some years I can feel the change in the air but right now, it feels kind of the same), yet, at the same time, everything feels different. I was very unhappy on New Year's Eve, thanks to my period and I think it threw everything off for me. 

Enough babbling, let's get into the first roundup of 2025! 

 Would you look at that...it's the final week of the year! I can't believe the year is over in just a few days; it doesn't even feel real but I've already said that many times. The last week of the year is honestly one of my favorites because it feels like an eternal weekend. I worked yesterday and today, and I'll work on Monday so I have some semblance of a routine, but I could hardly call it actual work.

This week feels like a time to reset, to relax, and to unwind. It's time to reflect, indulge, read and watch movies. It's like a cozy and cold summer vacation and it brings me so much joy.

It also weirdly makes me sad, because it means the best months of the year are over and I have to wait so long for September again. Christmas Day is more depressing than anything because the Christmas season is over; I felt like that when I was a kid and I feel like it now.

I don't want to dwell on the sadness so let's get into the last roundup of 2024! 

 I can't believe we have a little more than 1 week left until 2025. It sounds like such a fake year, I can't believe it's actually happening. I feel like we're all trudging to the finish line, but at the same time, it feels so far away. 

As I write this, New York is covered in our first snowfall of the year and it feels so good. I woke up before the sun this morning and because I laid in bed for hours, with my blinds drawn shut so I didn't realize it had snowed until my sister texted me asking if we had an ice scraper in the car. I love snow so much, I love the winter and what it symbolizes so the fact that it snowed on the winter solstice felt so kismet. 

This weekend I need to finish wrapping presents, do some food shopping and try to squeeze in as much Christmas tidings as I could. 

Let's get into the roundup...

 God, where has the month gone? How is it already December 13th? *the holy day, Taylor Swift's birthday*. The month is going by in a flash and I don't feel like I'm absorbing all the Christmas joy. Right now, as I type this, I don't feel very joyful. 

It's Thursday night, I'm watching Southern Charm with my Christmas tree lit and I feel so incredibly depressed. I've felt depressed all day and I can't shake it. I really feel like I need to cry but part of me is so numb that I can't seem to get it out. I'm hoping that I just need to go to sleep and I'll feel better tomorrow.

The week kind of went this way; I was in the office all week which was so nice! We had 2 holiday parties, I got my hands on a few new products, and it was so nice. The commute was horrifying because I work on 5th avenue and 5th avenue at Christmas time is brutal. 

This weekend is going to be spent finishing up Christmas shopping and maybe doing some wrapping. I need to make my time as joyful as possible.

Let's get into the roundup.

 Happy official Christmas season everyone! I hope you had a great Thanksgiving and are indulging in a few Black Friday sales. I've been off from work all week and it's been gloriously long; it truly feels like I haven't been at work in a month and that's how I know I needed a real break.

I had tons of doctor's appointments, got a haircut and even saw Wicked which was probably one of the best movies I've ever seen in my entire life. Thanksgiving was low key with lots of food and some family at my mom's house. 

I didn't get home till almost 10 PM which is a bit nuts, and then I got a horrible night's sleep. I've been sleeping so bad lately, I don't know what's going on. I need to figure it out because I got 3 hours of sleep last night...and then left the house at 5:45 to go to Target to get the Taylor Swift Eras Tour Book & Anthology Vinyl... which I did successfully. My Target was so organized and there was a small line of 10ish people when the store opened at 6 AM; employees guided us to the towers of books & vinyls, ensured we were only taking the allotted amount and then sent us on our way. I was in and out within 5 minutes, and then back to sleep by 6:45. 

Today, I'll be relaxing, maybe run a few errands, and doing some  things around the house. Earlier this week I rounded up a bunch of Black Friday sales from my favorite retailers and brands, so definitely check that out if you're feeling up for some shopping.

Now, let's get into the roundup.

 This was another long week that was weird; on Tuesday, it felt like Friday, on Wednesday it felt like Thursday...ever since election day it feels like the week between Christmas & New Year's. Time doesn't feel real but I'm going to need it to start acting like it. 

As we head into this weekend, I have my sister's engagement dinner with her friends which will be really nice, and then I'm planning on doing a lot of nothing. I have all of next week off before Thanksgiving, and I cannot wait. I have a lot of appointments but I also have some plans to get my life together. It's that time of year when I feel the need to deep clean my life from the inside out, and it feels so good.

Next week is also my birthday and I haven't really thought too much about it...I feel like I'm floating and I need to ground myself and get serious about my life.

Ok, let's get into the roundup.

 What a year this week has been. Since Tuesday, I've felt like it should be the weekend. I'm not sure if it's because of daylight savings and being back in the office after a week at home but this week was incredibly long. It was also very busy -- by the time it was Friday afternoon, I was completely wiped out. 

This is the first weekend since September that I have nothing to do -- zero obligations and I'm over the moon excited. I have a long list of things I want to get done, like decorating for Christmas, cleaning out my closets & drawers, and giving my house a deep clean.

I can't believe Thanksgiving and my birthday are in 2 weeks...this year has flown by and I'm not ready to think about it quite yet. I need to start Christmas shopping...which is also something that has to be thought about this weekend.

No more rambling, let's dive into the roundup.

Well, we've time traveled back to 2016. I don't want to talk extensively about it because I can't let myself. That is a privilege that I recognize but Tuesday was probably the worst panic attack I've ever had. I got less than 4 hours of sleep, was up all night checking my phone and was shaking so badly I thought I was having a heart attack. 

It was horrible, Wednesday was worse and now I just have to try to focus on myself and move forward. It's so much easier said than done but please focus on yourself. Focus on finding pockets of joy throughout the day, find a community and do something that isn't on the internet. 

I've logged out of Twitter and am in the process of deleting my account, I've removed Threads from my iPhone home screen and I'm staying off of TikTok. Instagram feels like a safe space right now which is fine, but I'm going to use this time to train myself to get out of the habit of constantly reaching for social apps. I've been wanting to stop doomscrolling for months now because I've noticed how negatively it has affected me and this is a really good excuse.

As much as I love social media and as much as I think it can do good, it's also the reason that this election went the way it did -- because of the misinformation, the opinions, the fighting.. it's just too much. I can't be part of it anymore, not in the way I have been for the past 10 years. As I write this, I haven't been on those apps in 24 hours and I have to say, that combined with 10 hours of sleep worked wonders on my mood and mental health.

When you focus on what's in front of you in the real world versus what's online, it's amazing what you're capable of. 

In addition to staying off those apps, I've downloaded a lot of phone games, the Shuffles Pinterest app and will probably scroll Substack for when I need the feeling of community -- which I think is going to be a big focus of the next four years. 

I've had this community for the past 13 years and I appreciate everyone who reads it. Be sure to follow me on Instagram and Substack for more interaction and I'm sending you all lots of love.

Let's get into the round up.

 Hi Friday! Hi November! What a month October was! I had been 'dreading' it for months only because I knew how busy I was going to be but it turned out to be an incredible few weeks with exciting parties, get togethers, and of course the Eras Tour. 

I still have a busy few weekends in November with baby showers & engagement parties, and of course, my birthday on November 30th but I'm excited and looking forward to it all. What I'm really looking forward to is for next week to be over; I need election day to be dead and gone. I will say I'm a lot less anxious than I was in 2020, but my 2016 PTSD is getting in the way.

I'm just hoping for the victory for the first woman president... 

Ok, now...let's get into my roundup!

 This is the 2nd time in a month that I've missed my round up post, the easiest post for me to write and I simply just didn't have the mental capacity last week to do it. 

I was coming down from a busy work week, some home issues and preparing for my trip to Miami....to see THE ERAS TOUR! If you follow me on social media you saw my weekend and my goodness, was it perfection. The weather in Florida could've been better but I laid on the beach, went in the pool, had delicious food and saw my favorite person in the world...Taylor Swift.

Experiencing the Eras Tour was transcendent. I can't even truly put the feelings into words. I couldn't believe I was there. I couldn't believe I was experiencing what I've been watching on grainy TikTok streams for the past year and a half. I couldn't believe it was real.

It was a perfect night that left me shaking & in tears. It was life changing in so many ways.

And now, I'm back in New York, back at work and back to a jam packed calendar of weddings, baby showers, birthdays and all kinds of celebrations. It's all positive things...until November 5th and then maybe we'll talk. The election is driving me insane and I really just want it to be over. I don't think I'll be calm until November 10th... 

Anyways, I'm hoping to get back on track here but those are always my famous last words.

Let's get into the roundup!